Deeks and Kensi…Are they really Soul Mates?

by Densiland | December 9, 2013 | Feature | wikiDeeks.com

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Soulmates?

What’s a soul mate?

It’s uh… Well, it’s like a best friend, but more. It’s the one person in the world that knows you better than anyone else. It’s someone who makes you a better person. Actually, they don’t make you a better person, you do that yourself because they inspire you. A soul mate is someone who you carry with you forever. It’s the one person who knew you and accepted you and believed in you before anyone else did or when no one else would. And no matter what happens, you’ll always love her. Nothing can ever change that. – Dawson’s Creek (2003)

We can easily hear these very words stemming from Deeks today rather than from another show from a decade past. How Deeks and Kensi have gotten to where they are now can be interpreted endlessly with near-infinite opinions. In fact, it’s more than likely these two would argue the point themselves. After all, it’s who they are.

Opposites attract?
Kensi could not be more opposite of Deeks in so many obvious ways:
• She’s serious; he’s the jokester.
• She’s messy; he’s a neat freak.
• She’s addicted to junk food; he’s a bit healthier.
• She’s controlling; he’s go-with-the-flow.
• She’s stoic; he’s expressive.
• She’s secretive; he’s (mostly) an open book.
While these differences may initially seem insurmountable, they actually (as cliché as it may sound) provide characteristics that are needed or wanted by the other.

The beginning (of the chase)
Deeks’ attraction, or at least interest, in Kensi seemed to be evident in their initial encounter. Whether as Jason/Deeks or Tracy/Kensi, some might say they set off each other’s “Spidey senses”. For Deeks, Kensi intrigues him with her integrated blend of femininity and bad-ass federal agent. It’s probable she is unlike any woman he has ever encountered. Where else might he find a woman who could just as easily be a model, fails to hide an unexpectedly odd yet endearing sense of humor all the while besting the guys with her sniper rifle? Layered on top of this is her reaction (or lack thereof) to him. She doesn’t fall victim to his blatant attempts at charm and flirtation. This only raises the stakes of the challenge and peaks his curiosity, which results in fanning the flames of Deeks’ apparent pursuit of her. He involuntarily engages in the chase, possibly never thinking he has a real chance to capture this prize. Like polarized magnets, the more she pulls away, the more he’s attracted to her.

Two sides of the same coin
An undeniable spark quickly formed between these two. Yet when each actually realized and acknowledged it is anyone’s guess. (A debate for the ages….) These two attractive people, spending countless hours together, putting their lives in the other’s hand… it could almost be predicted. The myriad of nicknames alone reveal (& sometimes veil) their varied feelings for the other. Yet these two go deeper, because at their core, they are more alike than different. While quite distinctive, each has dealt with hurtful issues connected to loss, challenging upbringings, splintered parental relationships, and distrust. Similarly, they share the deep-seeded value of justice that brought them both into the same high-stakes profession.

The reasons why
At the root of their continued game of “cat and mouse”, Kensi is his personification of goodness; she exemplifies the ability to overcome many of the damaging issues he’s faced in his own life. While he can’t see it in himself, he sees it in her. She provides a stability that his turbulent life has often lacked, while he provides a safe haven for her to express her feelings. He’s continually bewildered how she always has his back, even when he’s driven her to the edge of insanity with his relentless jokes and mockery. Yet, it’s taken time. Initially Kensi was nearly aghast at his laid-back attitude and atypical approach to an operation. Similarly, Deeks had to endure the more strict, by-the-book style of “military brat” Kensi. Following their offerings to each other at the end of “Empty Quiver” (2×16) about “taking things more seriously/trying to lighten up”, they have moved seamlessly toward each other in being more accepting of the other’s personality quirks.

The slow simmer
In spending so much time together, they have discovered the other’s wants and weak spots. The more feeling of the duo, Deeks, just wants to be accepted. While this continues to be a struggle for Kensi to openly express, she’s always there for him. It might take her a little longer, such as in reaching out post-torture, but clearly she wants to have that connection with him. And that’s it; even when she questions his statements or actions, the bottom line is she (now) accepts him for who he is. Kensi doesn’t seem to have yet learned Deeks doesn’t need a lot; a little goes a long way with this guy who hasn’t had much in his life. Along that same line, while Deeks clearly wants Kensi’s entire heart, he settles for prompting a simple smile from his partner. His detective skills have been put to good use; he’s discovered a slow, persistent approach to Kensi reaps rewards by skillfully dismantling her “wall” brick by brick, often without her awareness. As much as Kensi might faux outrage against Deeks’ advances (which is a less frequent occurrence these days), she actually longs for his efforts. Every time he focuses on her, it revives her ability and desire to trust. He continues to undeniably demonstrate his loyalty to her, permanence in her life, and encourages her to have faith in him. It’s as if he’s taking those bricks from around her heart and constructing a new solid foundation for them to stand on together.

The Frozen Lake and beyond
Deeks and Kensi finally reached a turning point that neither likely ever imagined actually becoming reality: they each honestly, albeit quite differently, expressed their personal feelings for each other. As always, even this moment of celebration was muddled with their continuing communication struggles, lack of control over their own emotions, and working to keep their personal and professional personas separate.

In record speed each of their fears came charging to the forefront. Kensi’s prediction of being unable to maintain their professional partnership became apparent on their very first op and Deeks’ apprehension that Kensi would “run” was fast-becoming an indisputable fact. For Kensi to break protocol on an Op and commit to “talking” more demonstrated she truly is in this as much as Deeks. It could not be denied the shy blush of Kensi in uttering the term “boyfriend” or the overflowing joy radiating from Deeks’ explosive smile in finally being able to refer to Kensi as his “girlfriend”. Luckily, in the end both were willing to compromise in working toward an amicable plan to move forward together. Yet moving with caution is paramount; each still needs to move slowly so as to not crack the fragile lake on which they now both stand. Their shared admissions provide hope and faith these two can (eventually) overcome whatever obstacles lie ahead.

The bottom line
So the question remains: Are Deeks and Kensi soulmates? They might be; they could be. Their similarities and differences have certainly formed an undeniable connection. Likewise, they fulfill wants and needs in each other and themselves. They are each flawed. As the song says, “We aren’t broken, just bent” is a fitting descriptor for these two, who would unquestionably agree with the sentiment. While they still have countless challenges to overcome, not the least of which are their warring communication (or lack thereof) styles, these fictional characters seem to have a long and winding road still ahead. Where it takes them (& us) remain to be seen, but in their own strange way, they’ve developed an irrefutable ‘ship, be that partnership, friendship, relationship, or some unique combination that can only be “Densi.”

What do you think?  Are Kensi and Deeks soul mates?  Leave your comments below….

7 comments

  • What a great read that was, and so true. I believe they are soul mates. I really do. They would do anything for one another.

  • Wow excellent writing i have got a massive lump in my throat after reading this.. the descriptions of both charactors is spot on.. everyone is willing this
    relationship to work can they control their emotions.. yes.. cause they have loved each other a long time before the apparent night they spent together.

  • Reading this was an absolute pleasure! I sincerely believe they are soul mates. I’m hoping this becomes a story with a happy ending and not one where they try it and are like “eh, pass”.

  • Great piece! I’ll agree with ECO and say that these two are clearly meant to be together. If and when that will come to pass though will be subject to the whims of the writers.

  • Great article. I think the majority of us truly believe that they are soul mates. Everything points towards that direction.

    About the whole opposites attract, Deeks seems to have made quite a turn since the beginning. He doesn’t eat THAT healthy (according to Recovery), his house is quite messy and it is not only because of his PTSD, and I doubt he is an open book. He is quite secretive himself and we know very few details about his past.

    Anyway, I absolutely love his character and I believe in the two of them. It is like you said, they bring out the best of each other. Certainly it is going to be a long bumpy road, but they will reach their destination!

  • Great post! The character descriptions are spot on.

    First and foremost, I believe that Deeks and Kensi are soul mates. From the moment they first met, Deeks got into Kensi’s nerves, and Deeks is so intrigue of Kensi. We all saw something between them from their first encounter of each other. I don’t know what it is but I’m assuming it’s a spark that they’ve ignited upon each other, a chemical reaction no one can explain.

    Usually when I talk about the characters, I also refer to their zodiac signs but when I read them, it doesn’t seem right. I refer to the zodiac signs because I found out their profiles accuracy with my sign and my best friend’s sign. I’m not an expert of Leo and Capricorn profiles so correct me when I’m wrong. If you ask me about my sign, Aquarius, and my best friend’s sign, Sagittarius, I’ll say I’m still not an expert but I can provide feedback because I have tons of Sagittarius friends.

    Anyway Kensi is a Fire sign, Leo, and Deeks is an Earth sign, Capricorn. I only found one thing that relates to Kensi and Deeks, is that Capricorn’s attraction to a Leo, and the good effects of a Capricorn to a Leo. If you read the zodiac profiles, you’ll understand why so instead, I’ll refer to other personality theories.
    I think that Deeks and Kensi are soul mates, they both have strong personalities but Kensi’s personality is much stronger than his personality. Kensi is sharp, go-getter, gets things done, and aggressive. Deeks is hardworking, patient, persistent, and can be good at anything as long as he put his mind into it. Like he said, he’s method. Kensi in my opinion seems to have a Choleric Personality while Deeks seems to have a Melancholic Personality basing it from the Personality Plus by Florence Littauer.

    That is not their exact personality; it’s just what I sense in them after taking the test, then reading and studying each personality.

    If you read a Leo’s profile, you will see their difference with Kensi. This difference I believe is brought by the hard experiences she went through growing up. It is also the same with Deeks, him being a jokester is a product of his experiences to be able to cope, grow, improve and be the best version of him.

    Just to be clear it doesn’t mean that Kensi possesses all the hundred percent attitudes and traits of a Choleric personality, just the majority of it and same with Deeks. So that is not their exact personality; it’s just what I sense in them.
    Years ago, I didn’t think that a relationship with two strong personalities is not possible because of the clashes and differences they possess but I realized that I’m wrong.

    I know tons of people with their personality and had managed to weather the storm and they are still together and stronger than ever.

    Deeks and Kensi’s differences and experiences, molded their personalities into something that will make them balance each other and make things work. They will teach other more things they’ll never learn from each other.

    Despite their differences, Deeks and Kensi have a long term potential for a successful relationship. They will help break each other’s walls and teach each other to see things differently. The differences they have create a wonderful cocktail of chemical reaction, and connection that is like an additional bonus when you buy a product that is customized and tailored to your needs. That is also why; I am amaze of how the writers made Deeks and Kensi’s characters to fit together like one of the missing piece in a puzzle. It even get’s better because I can see that their personalities are in conjunction also because of their experiences.

    Being in conjunction is usually a description for Zodiac signs.

    In my opinion Deeks and Kensi are soul mates, also basing it from David Kiersey Temperament Sorter and Helen Fisher personality theories. Deeks for me has a Guardian temperament, and a Builder personality while Kensi has a Rational temperament, and a Director personality.

    I just want to share that when you take the personality tests, it will not just tell you your dominant personality, it will also give you, your second dominant personality. All I mentioned above is either a dominant personality or their second dominant personality. I base my conclusions on the attitudes I notice they show on the show and basing it on their experience.

  • I think they are soul mates. I believe the writers set them up to fall for one another and develop a romantic relationship and are planning to let it grow as the series goes on. :D

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