February 2, 2015
We all need reminders in our life from time to time about the things that really matter. Like when we forget about why we were drawn to someone almost from the very beginning. I saw that reminder today in Deeks. He was so great with Tomas. The little boy was really scared and Deeks knew just what to do and say to make him feel better. He was also extremely upset when the DEA carted them all away, even more so than the rest of us. He had made a promise and it was eating him up to know that he couldn’t keep it. He’s always been an advocate for the underdog and a fighter of injustice. He wants to do his part to save the world which is why he’s trying to get us all to conserve water, albeit in crazy ways! It’s just part of who he is which again, was a reminder for me. His relief when we found out that they had been released was so great that he even hugged Granger. Mean old, unlovable Granger!
Being in the drug tunnel at the border was scary. It was so dark and bullets were flying everywhere with no place to hide. Maybe that’s why I didn’t really reply when he said, “This is why you should never fall in love,” as he pulled me back to climb up the ladder first. While we are doing much better with our communication skills, we still haven’t dealt with the ‘L’ word. Geez, I can’t even write it! Part of me wants to jump right in but the rest of me is afraid that if I actually say it, then something bad will happen or that I’ll be dooming our relationship in some way. All the men in my life have somehow left me and I can’t go through that again. My Dad, Jack, Dom, Renko… I just can’t lose him.
Maybe I’m being paranoid but for now, I plan to keep these feelings to myself awhile longer. We’ll just have to settle for the non-verbal communication that we do so well.