December, 13, 2020
One thing this field of work has taught me (along with living in LA), is you never know how things might change
in just two short weeks from one moment to the next. But back to that in a minute.
I tried. I tried again. And over and over. I tried to lead Kensi to the point of realizing this house was more than a bad idea. It’s definitely a fixer-upper, which takes money, of which we’re now bringing in roughly half. Actually even less than that because the bar is bleeding money.
Yet in the broad scheme of things, NONE of that matters when the person at the center of your life is being hunted by a psychopath!
So I tried. The needed updates, lack of income, growing debt, physical jeopardy. And none of it broke through. (Apparently I’ve lost my lawyerly arguing skills.) When Kensi sets her sights on something she wants, no one and nothing will stop her. (Guess I should take solace that I’m one of the things she wanted.) So it came down to the cold hard fact that we just can’t afford the mortgage payment. Having to tell her that… The look on her face…. I don’t know which of us felt more disappointed in that moment: She lost her home; I lost her belief in me. !*&% 2020!
It’s a demonstration of how desperate Kensi became when she offered the plan to have the newly-minted Billionaire Beale be our Sugar Daddy. And then she has the… gall to push me into doing the ask?! There’s a reason I now workout like a madman – I have no job, no income, a failing business, and an endangered wife. Trust me, no amount of push-ups are going to work off this stress – to which she just piled on! Yet, the pleading in her voice, trying to sound so innocent? Ugh – everyone knows I can’t say no to her!
Again, I tried. But I just couldn’t do it. Eric is using his wealth to help so many more people who are in far more dire straits than we are. How could we get in the middle of that? Also in question, what the frack was growing on his face?!
One I finally came to the solution of selling the bar, it was pretty easy. That compared to Kensi’s happiness? No contest. However, I should have just remembered it’s the holiday season, which means one BIG (or rather notably small) unpredictable aspect – Hetty. Like Santa she swooped in and (again!) gave us an incredible Christmas gift: I’m going to FLETC! (Dang it’s a good thing I’ve been working out so much after all!) I’ve struggled for a long time with my identity as a cop vs agent. Now the issue is out of my hands – & I very much look forward to being (Very) Special Agent Deeks!