It Should Be Me: Kensi’s Journal 11/20/22

I really look forward to these refresher courses.  I love learning new things, pushing myself to be better, and competing with my colleagues.  But when Deeks mentioned that Rosa had the flu, it was all I could do to keep from telling my instructor that I had a family emergency and hopping on the next flight to LA.  At least then one of us could have stayed home with her while the other went to work.  I can’t imagine how hard it must have been for Deeks to have seen Rosa feeling so lousy and then have to leave her.  I’m glad Mama B was available on such short notice, but I really wish it hadn’t been necessary.  Deeks and I are Rosa’s parents, and it should have been one of us caring for her when she was sick. 

When I called tonight to check up on Rosa and Deeks sounded like he’d been hit by a bus, my guilt reached new levels.  Not only wasn’t I there to help take care of our sick daughter, but I won’t be the one to give Deeks his crunchy peanut butter either (why he insists on eating that when he’s sick, I’ll never understand).  Again, thank goodness for Mama B, but it should be me doing all that mothering.