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The Pain of Pessimism: Deeks’ Surf Log 5/2/21


When we do our jobs right and vanquish the bad guys out there, we give the world hope. It’s what gets our blood pumping and motivates us to get up and out the door every morning. Ironically, I can’t do the same for the person I love the most in the world. I can’t give her that hope. All the doctors and medical procedures in the world can’t give my love what she wants so desperately. 

I know Kensi. The despair and pessimism she shows when she lashes out at me is her way of working through the pain. She thinks she is letting me down and hates herself for it. I just have to be encouraging and optimistic because if I don’t she will fall down that rabbit hole and I’ll never find her again. I think that’s what happen after she lost her father and Jack.  She can’t ever live in that kind of disappointment again. 

I try and give her the gift of hope every day.  It gives her the time to think things through. She remembers that if nothing else we have each other. And for me that will always be enough. 

About Diane (371 Articles)
Founder, Writer and Contributing Editor of wikiDeeks. Always wanted to put together a talented team of writers and graphic designers who loved NCISLA and Marty Deeks in particular! My dream came true! Hope you enjoy what we have created!

2 Comments on The Pain of Pessimism: Deeks’ Surf Log 5/2/21

  1. So sad, yet so Deeks. Well done

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I love the surf logs. It’s like picking up a good book and not being able to put it down because it is so addictive you just got to see how Marty is feeling each day x this particular blog reminds me of a quote from Thapa ‘ take your time she will wait for you’ I suspect this could be reversed to fit the feelings of Marty. (For Kensi) ‘Take your time HE will wait for YOU.

    Liked by 1 person

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